Are all thoughts true?
I learned a lot about myself through consistent meditation practice. One of them is not to trust everything my mind tells me.
After I started meditating, I realize how fickle and busy my mind is. This was new to me as I had minimal difficulty focusing on my task on hand. I have always been the focused one, be it at school or work. Thus, I believed that I can control my thoughts and these thoughts are translated into feelings and behaviors. Little did I know that the mind has a life of its own.
If you can just take a moment to have your eyes closed for 3 minutes and notice the breath coming in and out of your nostrils. What do you notice? Likely, you will find that your mind had started wandering around to the next thing to do, a forgotten task or a random face may appear.
Not all thoughts are true and generated by choice. Conditioning from parents and surrounding planted seeds in it, resulting in certain automatic thought patterns. These thoughts may arise as a reflex to a situation but they are not necessarily true.
Before this, I never truly scrutinize those thoughts. Once I started to scrutinize my thought, I could see how quickly I jump to conclusions. It was profound for me. I started to see that certain thoughts are stories I tell myself instead of the truth. As thoughts flash past me such as “he doesn’t love me” or “I will not make it”, I notice them and ask myself - “Are they true? What story am I telling myself?”
Simple questions, yet so powerful. We often believe in everything the mind tells us.
This opened up doors to more wakefulness experiences for me. I start to see the judgemental self. I start to see the anxiety caused by projecting thoughts about the future. I start to see my frustration due to things I cannot change. I start to realize that this mind being a wild horse, was the source of my anxiety, insecurity, and my restlessness.
Knowing this, I continue to sit. The goal isn't about taming the mind. My practice is to be aware of this mind. Aware when the mind is distracted, aware when the mind is being judgemental, and aware when the mind is being unkind.
When I am aware of the patterns of the mind, I can choose my responses. I could choose to act on those thoughts or let them pass. Sometimes, I want to deny certain thoughts as they are not all pretty. Some thoughts make me wonder if I am a good and kind person. Yet, thoughts are merely thoughts. I am learning to accept them, all of them. Accepting them does not mean that I believe them all as truths. The reality is, I know the mind is not dependable.
So what do I do with the mind? Continue to befriend the mind. Pause and reflect on whether the thought is true. Pause and reflect on whether the thought is serving or not serving me.
As time passes, I have learned to cultivate and encourage kind thoughts towards myself and others. The unkind ones? They still appear. I just choose not to entertain, elaborate, and give them significance.
It has made me more kind to the people around me, and most of all, to myself.
