How can I find my passion?
“I am so envious of you – you know what you want. You have a passion for coaching. I am not sure about what my passion is. I am just working.”
Not just 1 person said this to me as I left my corporate job last week to focus on growing my coaching business. There were more than 5 people who said this in one way or the other.
This sentence hit me deeply and transported me back to 11 years ago when my manager asked me a question while we were doing career & life mapping as part of a career day exercise.
“What do you want to achieve in 10 years’ time? What are you passionate about?”
My mind went blank and I looked at him.
He said – “You should know what you want! If not, how are you going to get there?”
I felt stressed.
On my A3 paper, I just scribbled – I want to be promoted to sales director, get married, and own a big house.
I had to put down something but inside me, I was feeling lost.
I had no idea what I truly wanted.
I wanted to figure out how I can live a more fulfilling and meaningful life to me because it sucks to feel so lost.
So, I started to search.
I picked up this book called "What Should I Do with My Life" by Po Bronson.
It’s an entertaining read showing collections of different people with different career paths.
By the end of it, I was as confused as ever.
There are so many paths – which one should I take?
For every path, there are opportunity costs of not choosing the other path.
Which path is best for me?
I couldn’t find an answer within the books.
That was an early lesson for me - that reading more memoirs and experiences from other people will not help me in figuring out my life purpose & my passion.
So, what shifted in the last 11 years that I am so much clearer about my purpose, and what gives me fulfillment?
In case you’re wondering, I did not wake up one day and “tadah! I knew.”
Instead of just searching and searching for a passion, I started paying attention and noticing.
At work, what did I enjoy doing the most? What are my strengths? What made the time fly by very quickly?
I also started paying attention to my personal life.
What books usually catch my eye and I would finish reading them easily? What kind of interaction makes my heart feel full?
Then, I started to notice a pattern –
I enjoyed serving others and the well-being space calls to me. It made my heart full.
I enjoyed coaching and guiding my juniors.
I feel especially energized when I am doing projects related to well-being in the organization.
I loved deep conversations and feel energized and nurtured after.
So, I went on and do more of it.
I volunteered to teach yoga for free in the office (and went on to take a yoga teacher certification)
I pitched for funding and support to run fitness challenges.
I volunteered to coach and mentor others even though they do not report to me.
I volunteered to conduct mindfulness sessions within the organization and for friends.
I wasn’t clear if any of these are my “passion” but I just enjoyed doing them.
I also noticed the parts that I did not enjoy as well. So, I did less of that (rallying for a fitness challenge campaign was too draining for me)
Even though I was working in my corporate job, I never stopped paying attention to what sparked joy for me and did more of it.
I felt purposeful.
As time goes by, it became clearer that coaching & mindfulness facilitation are what I really want to do more of at this stage of life.
With that, it also became clear to me that becoming a sales director is no longer my goal.
So, if you’re unclear about what you want in life and what is your passion, there's nothing wrong with you.
Trust me, it's normal. I have been there, you're not alone.
Stop looking at what are the exciting things your friends are doing.
Instead, start paying attention to
- What gives me joy?
- What topic draws my attention?
- What am I curious about?
- What do I do that time just flies by?
Then, do more of that. Take 1 step in that direction.
It may be reading a book, it may be talking to someone in that area. It may be going for a course to deepen your understanding.
It doesn’t have to become your career. It can complement your career by energizing you.
Or, it may already be something in your career!
Through taking action, you may discover that certain things sounded great in your mind but after doing it, you realize that you don’t like it as much as you thought. (I thought I would love teaching yoga, but I realize I don’t like it as a career)
And, that’s completely fine!
Knowing what you don’t like is a step closer towards charting a fulfilling life for you.
Please don’t just sit there and TRY to figure it out. Without feedback from action, you’ll stay in the same thinking spot for years.
Start by paying attention to what sparks joy in your daily life and in your work.
Allow yourself to take incremental steps to grow that.
See it as an experiment, an experiment to know yourself better.
Remember, the answer doesn’t lie outside of us, it’s within us.
PS: If you are feeling lost and stuck in a rut, I can support you in discovering how you can live a more fulfilling life and start taking meaningful action. You don’t have to figure it out all by yourself, coaching will support you in discovering your inner compass to guide you at work and in life.
Do apply for a free discovery call and explore if this is what you need to help you “unstuck”.
PPS: If you resonate with this reflection and find it helpful, share this with your friends and family. They can choose to subscribe to the upcoming newsletters here.
Love,
TJ
NEWSLETTER
Subscribe to my newsletter for more stories, tips & ideas on how to thrive with more confidence & joy
