How do you celebrate success?
Yes, I would like to proceed with coaching with you.”
He answered with a smile on his face.
We had a short chat to clarify the details and then I wrapped up the session.
After I clicked “end zoom meeting”, I relaxed back into my chair.
“Mmm, that was a good session.” – I thought.
“How can I replicate this success? How can I do even better next time?”
I notice my mind starts to analyze what’s working and what’s not working.
Then, I recall a podcast episode I heard that morning.
"We don’t celebrate success enough, we don’t often let ourselves FEEL successful."
That is exactly me!
Here I am, a client signed up and I feel happy for 5 seconds in my mind.
Then, I move on to planning.
My body is not even registering that something great is happening!
My body has completely ignored celebrating this moment and is already preparing me for strategizing for what’s next.
In fact, my body feels slightly heavy.
Thoughts of – “Wow, he trusts me. I must not let him down” came up.
I realize this is my pattern.
I respond to success and good results with a very short-lived acknowledgment in my mind, then I would have some doubt and anxiousness closely following behind.
This happens not just in my business. It happens when I get promoted at my corporate work too.
“How can I do even better? Will they find out I am not that great? What if it was luck?”
Since I have been doing this for years, my body remembers the feeling of doubt and anxiousness even when I created results.
The body doesn’t remember the ecstatic feelings that come with success, and is afraid to go there because it feels foreign.
Funny, isn’t it?
Celebrating success actually feels unsafe in my body – as though I shouldn’t celebrate in case things would go wrong.
I no longer want to live in fear and doubt. I want to live in the moment and feel good about myself.
I learned that I can acknowledge myself more often by telling myself – “hey, you did a great job. I am proud of you” (I still don’t do it enough)
It is super cliché at first but it does help. I start to appreciate myself more and show up with more ease.
Is that enough? No.
That was only the first step.
I was acknowledging in my mind – however, most of our actions are driven by subconscious feelings embedded in our bodies.
Ever wondered why you can keep telling yourself to calm down but your heart can still feel like it’s going to beat out of your chest and your palms become sweaty? You would feel better after taking slow deep breaths instead of repeatedly telling your mind to calm down.
The body speaks a different language. The body needs to feel.
That’s why I need to educate my body too!
Educating my body to recognize the good feelings that come with success and feel safe with it.
Letting my body know that it’s okay to celebrate.
What did I do?
I stood up, looked up for a song on Spotify and I danced.
I moved and let loose. (Husband is laughing at me from afar but I don’t care 😊)
I instantly FEEL much better!
All it took was 3:18 minutes.
Now, I feel victorious and happy from within. It’s no longer a cognitive exercise anymore.
I am letting my body connect the dots of celebrating and acknowledging how it can feel great in the body.
Our bodies remember but we need to remind it often.
It takes practice.
We have a survival instinct and our body is trying to protect us by being on standby mode in responding to potential threats. My body is preparing me for war - even when I don’t need to go to war.
So, other than rewiring how I talk to myself, I am rewiring how my body feels too.
When I feel good, I now look for a way to channel that into my body and do something that my body actually feels good!
The body doesn’t recognize words - it remembers how it feels.
I believe in how energy attracts and flows.
When I allow myself to feel good about something, I can feel this positive energy fuelling up my body, giving me more motivation to do great work.
So, I wish the same for you too.
When you have good news or achieved a milestone, no matter how small it is, acknowledge and celebrate with your mind AND body!
Choose an activity that makes your body feels nourished.
It can be punching your fist to the air, dancing, singing, hugging yourself, running, eating a super delicious chocolate – anything physical that helps the body remember. It doesn't have to be elaborate. The important thing is that the body has to feel good.
Have fun! I am rooting for you.
You may feel silly doing it for the first time even if no one is watching you. Just know that this can make you feel happier, more secured and confident from within. To me, that is way more valuable than feeling silly.
Who knows, you may start to really enjoy it! I know I did.
PS: If you resonate with the article and find it helpful, please share this to your friends and family.
Love.
TJ
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