Should you quit or keep holding on?
How many times have you heard of the saying “never give up”?
I hang on to this idea without a doubt because it really makes sense!
It’s what powered me through my academic years and those tough years being a young key account manager in a Fortune 500 company.
Successful people don’t give up easily. They persevere.
When Angela Duckworth talks about the importance of grit, I go “yeahhhhh, that’s it. That’s why people are successful”
So, when I received an email last week from a successful business owner announcing that she will be closing her 7-figure business while it’s still thriving because it no longer serves her, I read it 3 times.
The first time I read it, I was in shock. What’s going on in her mind? I felt like she was just getting really big! Through the last 2 years, I have seen her hit record high income & follower milestones. She was also actively scaling up last year.
The second time I read it, Woah, she really did it. It’s sinking in.
The third time I read it, I felt a mix of emotions that I could not really describe.
It’s as if my mind understands the words but my body seems to have a hard time comprehending them.
I’m happy for her. I respect her decision and I wish her the very best.
At the same time, it touched some part deep within me.
Quitting something is never really an option for me. Not when I was young, or even now.
All along, quitting signifies failure and with it, there’s shame.
The strong ones never quit – at least that’s what I believed in.
In the email, she quoted from the book “Quit” – Quitting on time often feels like you’re quitting too early. (after reading the email, I bought the book and started reading it. It’s been mind opening)
I can resonate with it so much.
Quitting feels more difficult than hanging on at times.
I see it not just in myself, I also see it in many highly driven ambitious individuals around me.
Quitting requires us to embrace the unknown whilst hanging on feed into our need for familiarity and stability.
However, to what extent do we hold on to things that no longer serve us?
Be it relationship or work.
Just because we still have the capacity to hold on to something, doesn’t mean that we have to.
Yet, we often don’t let go or quit until we are suffering so much or when things have gone too bad.
At that moment, I felt sorry for the past versions of myself.
I never gave myself permission to quit things that I no longer like.
I would judge myself.
When I read her email about closing down her business not because she was forced to but because she chose to, I was touched.
I did not see her as a failure at all. Instead, I admired her courage and her honesty to herself.
I wonder – why do I have to be so hard on myself when I decide to quit something that no longer serves me?
When I am deciding whether to quit something, I focus so much on things that I am losing out on and ignored what I could possibly gain.
This has made me too prudent.
I invite you to reflect upon your life and work too.
1) In what area are you holding on just because you think you have put in so much effort and thus, it’s a waste to let go? (sunk cost fallacy)
2) In what area are you holding on because you think that quitting is for the weak? (living up to a label instead of following your inner compass)
3) What can you gain by quitting what no longer serves you (even if they have served you well in the past)?
As I read the book “Quit” – I noticed I have overlooked so much and had bias when I read success stories.
To start something new, it often requires quitting something old.
To innovate, one has to quit old ways of thinking.
To embrace a new loving relationship, one has to quit the relationship that has turned toxic.
Yes, we should still have grit.
Yet, never let grit be a barrier to letting go of things that no longer spark joy or give you a sense of hope.
Hanging on to things just because “I am not someone who gives up” is a rigid and self-limiting way of living. It is stubbornness.
Hanging on to things that you still deeply believe in and that gives you meaning and joy no matter how tough it gets, is grit.
Know the difference.
Give yourself permission to pursue wholeheartedly of what’s worthy, and let go completely of what’s not worthy.
PS: If you resonate with the article and find it helpful, please forward this to your friends and family. They can choose to subscribe to the upcoming newsletters here.
Love,
TJ
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